"Justin, I know that my mom just passed and everything, but I don't want you to feel bad for me. Or spoil me with love or material things. I just want to act normal, like nothing happened. It that fine with you?" I said as I took another bite into the savory chicken dinner.
He was a really good cook, and I'm glad and proud that he did it all by himself this time.
"Perfectly fine with me. I just don't understand how you're so... Okay with this."
"I guess I'm just able to put up with it."
We finished up the dinner and I thanked him a lot for it as we washed the dishes together. He still didn't understand why I was okay, but he didn't question it again anymore.
"Ya know, you make me smile in my weakest moments. I love it." I confessed.
"Really?" he said, smiling as he dried some plates.
I nodded and we finished the dishes too. We sat around for a bit and I had Justin take a few full body pictures of me because we agreed to post them online, for everyone to see. I wanted people to understand the real reasons why I was in the hospital. All my scars were visible. On my stomach. On my neck. On my feet. On my wrists and on my hands. But I was ready to face what was to come next. My scars were ugly, but at the same time they were beautiful.
I posted the pictures on Instagram, with a caption saying: my insecurities make me beautiful. this past week will not be forgotten. I've been to the hospital a few times, as you probably know, but what you don't know is my story. I just want your support, that's all I ask for <3.
My picture got thousands of likes within a short time, and it was all over Twitter and Facebook already. I was glad to look at the comments and see that everyone was so supportive. A few people here and there weren't, but they were all ignored by us.
"Babe, look." Justin said, taking my hand and guiding me to sit by him on the couch.
He showed me the new trends on twitter and I was taken back by it. #PrayFor(YN) was trending. The tweets were all so sincere, I couldn't believe that fans did this. People were posting pictures of there own bodies, explaining their stories. Justin and I smiled and laughed at all of the silly ones, people just messing around and acting dumb. I couldn't believe I got so many people to open up about themselves. It was amazing to see.
I laid on Justin as we talked about how we were going to handle telling everybody my real story. I really had no idea to handle it
"Are you sure you want to tell people, I mean we can keep this between us. We are the only ones who know, and that doesn't have to change." he said, kissing the top of my head.
"I want people to know. They act like they know, but they need to know the truth. I'm not afraid of telling people that I was getting beat for 17 years of my life."
He smiled and continuously kissed me. I laughed and tried to push him away, but he just ended up laying over me and pinning me down. I felt a lot better throughout everything that had happened. And when Justin finally let me go, we went upstairs to cuddle in bed. Justin held me close from behind and I felt his warm breath trickle down my neck. My comfort level rose and it felt nice to have a normal night after being so hectic.
The next morning, Justin and I got up together. He had to head to the studio, but it was fine with me. It was his career and I wanted to be alone anyways, some time to myself for once. I decided to watch some TV, and contact some people back, informing them that I was okay. First, I called the boys. I knew that they needed to know first before anyone else.
"Hello?" I said.
The phone rang once before it was picked up, they must be anxious, I thought.
"(YN)! Is that you?" they all yelled different things.
I laughed and tried to calm them down.
"Yes, yes. It's me. I'm fine guys, don't worry."
"We saw your post, is everything okay? Are you sure? What happened?"
"I'm sure. Well not completely. I guess I can tell you guys what happened, but promise to keep it between us, I decided that I don't want very many people knowing."
"Yeah, yeah of course!"
I stopped laughing and caught my breath. They were funny when they were worried.
I told them the whole story, trying not to give to much detail about at the house. They said sorry, like people usually did, and I continued to call Hannah and tell her. She was worried sick too, and devastated when I told her. My mom and her were close, you could say, when I took her back to LA with me. I calmed her down as she cried on the phone, telling her that I was fine and everything was okay. I was scheduled to leave back to New York tomorrow, along with Justin. Life in California didn't turn out how we wanted it when we visited...
What do you think ?
-Ana.
I love this story! Please update soon, I love you so much<3
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